Don't Tees Me

You can stop holding your breath now, because



For a new batch of t-shirts.

Brace yourself for design #1:

This one is for kids, and I am trying to get some baby sizes, too. I tried to make the colors kind of androgynous. (I learned my lesson after a hush fell over the Internet when I introduced last fall's stunning pink-and-brown combination.) Also, every parent knows that if you want to find your kid in a crowd, the red shirt doth beckon like a beacon. A beacon that gives you permission to holler, "BRITNEY! GET YOUR ASS OVER HERE RIGHT NOW!"

I am going to go with the Hanes tagless 100% cotton tees again because they look so great after a couple of washes.

Next we have design #2:

This is a women's shirt. Different colors, same cheerful, summery font. Actually, this would be a great masthead if I had a blog named "Blog." I think of it as an exhortation. "You! Yes, you! Think of a clever domain name! Go blog!*" But it says all that in a casual, swinging-a-Barbie-doll-around-by-its-hair sort of way.

*Next St. Patrick's Day I might do a green shirt that says, "Erin Go Blog." You know, for the ten people who would think that's funny.

The BLOG shirts will be the same nice, breast enhancing Hanes shirts that take some women to the very limits of propriety. (If you don't know what I mean go check out some of the links at the bottom of my t-shirt page.)

And then there's #3:

I know. OBVS. I mean, I'd wear one. In fact I may be wearing a whole lot of them if nobody agrees with ye olde provocative saying.

And for #4, I'm also reordering the regular, black "writing well is the best revenge" tees so if you've been craving the classics you need to e-mail me and order one right now. This instant! Go! Erin Hit Send!

All shirts should be ready to ship at the end of May so E-MAIL ME if you're willing to prepay, then I'll be able to ship out your shirt tout de suite before I close up shop and run off for a long-ish June trip to points east. I'll be back in business in July, though, and then I'll be hauling all this swag up to BlogHer. So if you want to wait you can purchase from me there at discounted conference prices, but ordering now guarantees I'll have your size.

Which reminds me, there's been something I've been meaning to tell you but my bottomless trench of diffidence hasn't allowed me to cough it up:

I'm speaking at BlogHer.

I knew I should have kept my big mouth shut, but I had this idea for a panel that I'd like to go to and I said to GraceD, "Hey! Wouldn't it be great if there was a panel about blogs being an artistic end in themselves? You know, for all of us so-called writers who most likely won't actually finish the novel/play/book of essays we've been working on for the last fifteen years. A discussion about all the work we put into writing something that will never end up on anyone's shelf wearing a dust jacket with a picture of shoes and feet?" And Grace said, "You should tell that idea to Elisa." And then I did! And after a fair amount of back-and-forth I found that I, MYSELF, was a proud co-owner of this panel, which they folded in with another idea they had about doing something similar with visual artists. So now I'm the writer blogger on the panel with an art blogger and a photo blogger and I am kind of stumped about which tools to use to approach this subject so that I can neatly carve it up and lay it on your plate. So that, if you choose to attend, your hour-and-a-half (DEAR GOD, AN HOUR-AND-A-HALF) will provoke some thought about Why We Do This, The Blogging, and explore the idea of blogging as a valid medium for what would otherwise be a bunch of scraps in my pocket that would end up in a forgotten file folder labeled "Story Ideas." At the very least I will try to make my part in this conversation mildly amusing, and then there will be cocktails. And Susie Bright is going to be there, for god's sake. Cocktails with Susie! I may faint.

One final note for those of you who don't check my Flickr page: I'm growing my hair out again and it is agonizing. Really, I hate it, and somehow, unlike the last time around, taking pictures every day feels really, really stupid, but I'm going to keep doing it because I have this idea that the accumulation of images will be somewhat interesting, even if the daily ones aren't so much. It's sort of like watching paint dry, except with captions. And not very good ones at that. I know, you really want to go over there now, don't you! Fuck.