More proof that I should have been born a man

What's the deal with the mustache? I've tried bleaching, I've tried waxing, God help me I even pluck occasionally. And it still looks like a hedgehog is slowly trying to push its way out of my mouth through my upper lip. While I was pregnant my facial hair was light and soft, plus I only had to shave my legs once a month (a drastic shift from the daily mowing) and my toes even stopped looking like Bilbo Baggins's (or, in the Harvard Lampoon version that I prefer, Dildo Bugger's). It's real proof of the power of hormones. What are the advantages of having a little extra testosterone in your system? Again, people, I am not a scientist (though I may look like one while mixing gimlets), but, well, once I changed a flat tire on a van that was leaning into a ditch. Does that count?