My faith, it is crumbling, it has been crumbled, it shall have been turned into dust. The news is absolutely unconscionable and I’m sitting here like a pampered Westerner wondering why no one is stepping in on my behalf to stop it. Normally I can just write to my representatives and donate to Doctors Without Borders to feel like I’m helping, and the situation eventually resolves to the point that it drops out of the news and I stop worrying so much because some other horror has taken its place. Is it too much to ask for decent people in leadership to make it look like we’re all on the right side of history? Because this thing that I want, this simple thing, keeps not happening.
I recently saw a few social media posts on the concept of “soul loss,” which is a term that comes from shamanism. Simply put, when you either experience or witness a traumatic event, the part of you that can’t tolerate the pain of it goes into hiding, or flies away to safety, and as a consequence you’re not quite whole.
So here we sit on our couches witnessing atrocities that we are unable to stop — and it’s not just what’s happening in Gaza, or Ukraine. It’s Covid and the economy and rent and health and the climate and how much I want to protect the next generations from all this harm we’ve created. And what happens next is that the part of our brains/souls that is not okay with any of it either hops onto a little anxiety hamster wheel of make it stop, make it stop, make it stop, or it just flies off . . . somewhere? I love reading about shamanism, these guys just go into trances and visit the moon. Go on, then, sir, please bring back some lunar wisdom for me because I’m not doing ayahuasca in this lifetime, thank you very much for offering, though.
Celebrating 25 Years of Touching My Toes
However, we are experiencing soul loss on a global level and only now am I realizing that most of our leaders have been operating with half a soul for quite some time. I am honestly waiting/praying for the massive type of relief that will result in Renaissance-level healing for us all. But I despair at the lengths we might still have to go before that arises. LOL
So while we are collectively Not Solving The Big Problems, I’m told there are ways to make your self whole, or whole-er so you can live to witness/fight another day: therapy, meditation, sobriety, all that. Candles, do they help? They make things look cozy, they smell nice, and churches are full of them, if that’s your bag. I keep trying yoga, but I don’t know. I mean, I still love it, it absolutely won’t let me quit and believe me, I have tried. Shout out to my teacher, Steve, who doesn’t seem to mind if I drop out and come back every few years and have to start from nearly scratch. (Side note: Steve started teaching me the primary series of ashtanga yoga in January of 1999, so happy silver anniversary to both Steve and my SI joint.)
While we’re waiting on that LMAO
I guess I’ll just write on my website like the little old blogger lady I am. I would be documenting the progress of our kitchen renovation to distract you, but in a time of unmerciful income inequality, getting another goddamned stove doesn’t seem like the most relatable content. Although I am going on Social Security this month! With all due respect and thanks to my dear dead husband and his lifetime earnings. It’s not exactly enough to live on but it will keep us in candles, kibble, and Bar Keepers Friend.