Some places have autumn; we have the apocalypse

As you may have heard, Southern California en el fuego. We have fires to the north of us, fires to the south of us, and lots of wet, green fields all around us. Despite the 80 degree heat and 50 m.p.h. wind gusts, we're feeling fortunate at the moment, although when I look toward the ocean and see all the pretty oil platforms out there -- all it takes is one leaky pipe and a flaming tumbleweed, my friends.