If you're in Santa Barbara tonight and you want to come over to Chaucer's and say hello and have me sign a book or two, that would be INCREDIBLE. For me! Maybe not for you. But probably for you? Look, I'm not making any promises. We'll be at Harry's afterward, then I'll start making promises. I would have made this announcement earlier but technology has failed me (and I, it) in one creative way or another every day this week so far. Mysteriously broken laptop in the shop for two days? Check. Web site crash after a WordPress update? Check. Accidentally washed a Flip video camera? CHECKITY CHECK.

Unfortunately, I didn't take that many pictures while I was in New York, but I plan on rectifying that in the coming weeks as Alice and I continue to Bring the Panic! to Portland, Seattle, San Francisco, Burlingame, Minneapolis, Chicago, New Orleans, Los Angeles, and Denver. And then I'm going to come home and sleep for a year.

Tour specifics are below. We'd love to see you if we come to your town, or within 100 miles of your town. You have a car and enough gas for a four-hour drive, right?

Here is a picture of Alice looking lovely and me looking like a tipsy ostrich:

There will be meet-ups before, after, and between each event, so that we can hang out with the locals and also because we're writers and we need our daily dose of bar food. The Pacific Northwest leg of the tour is being generously sponsored by BlogHer. My Tour page will be updated with meet-up details as soon as they become available.

Tuesday, April 5 at 7:00 pm Powells 3415 SW Cedar Hills Blvd. Beaverton, OR

Wednesday, April 6 at 7:00 p.m. Third Place Books 6504 20th Ave. NE Seattle, WA 98115

Saturday, April 9 at 3:00 p.m. Books Inc. 1375 Burlingame Ave. Burlingame, CA 94010

Sunday, April 10 at 11:00 a.m. Green Apple Books 506 Clement St. San Francisco, CA 94118-2324

Monday, April 11 at 7:00 p.m. Barbara’s Bookstore 1218 S. Halsted St. Chicago, IL 60607

Tuesday, April 12 at 7:00 p.m. Barnes & Noble 2100 North Snelling Ave. Roseville, MN 55113

Thursday, April 14 to Saturday, April 16 Mom 2.0 Summit Alice and I will be presenting a workshop called "Let's Panic About Writing"

Tuesday, May 17 at 7:00 p.m. Tattered Cover Book Store 9315 Dorchester St. Highlands Ranch, CO 80129

Something's also being cooked up for Los Angeles in mid-May, and, of course, we'll be at BlogHer in August! Come watch me nap on the floor in front of the Purina Mom Chow® booth.