We are babysitting Cookie's sister, Rosette, for a couple of days. Aside from the fact that Rosette is 50% larger than our own little runt, she is 192.7% more afraid of being clubbed and skinned and having her carcass left to rot on the frozen tundra:

My resemblance to a baby harp seal is unsettling, I know. I'm sorry.

Please don't feed me to an orca.

For the record, this dog has been raised on pure love and sunshine, she's just extraordinarily shy. And when she sleeps she snores like two drunken lumberjacks.

We're thinking about keeping her. I am such a sucker. Please stage a bulldog puppy intervention for me before I adopt again.